He's not at Gleneagles, why? Because of his schedule. I daresay Justin Rose had his schedule too but he tossed it out of the window in New Jersey last week on his way to the airport. He's all but guaranteed a place in Nick Faldo's side but he came just to make sure. Soren Hansen and Oliver Wilson came, both trying to protect their spots. Martin Kaymer and Ross Fisher came, looking for a place in the top ten. Darren Clarke and Colin Montgomerie came, trying to catch Faldo's eye for a pick.

Poulter's not here because it wasn't possible, he says. He needs to play 15 events in America to retain his card and he's only played 14. But he's got time, right? After the Ryder Cup he's got, what, six more tournaments in which to add the extra one?

Yeah, in theory. But he's going to China, remember.

Five events, then.

And possibly Singapore.

OK, four events.

Not forgetting Japan.

Three events?

And South Africa.

Two events?

Not even! The Shark Shootout man!

One event?

What do you think he is? A machine. Guy needs to take a break sometime, you know. That's his holiday week. Would you begrudge him it after all the essential travel he'll have done by then? So, you see, his hands were tied. He had no choice. Couldn't make it to Scotland. Agonised over it. Tossed and turned. But he had to play in Boston this week. Had to, had to. Don't be dissing him now. Remember the burning desire. Can you feel it? Are you warmed by its glow?

Not a lot, frankly. Why is he really not here? After his fiery denial of a secret deal with Faldo, we'll give him the benefit of the doubt and say his absence has nothing to do with anything Faldo might have said or didn't say to him in private. Having believed that part of his story, we'll challenge him on another. The idea of the 15 events being a factor is risible, pure and simple. The Shark Shootout? Puh-lease.

Why then? Possibly because Poulter believes he's done enough already this year to convince Faldo of his merits, that his record stands for itself, that nobody else's record of those chasing a wild card is as good as his. He trotted out a few stats on Thursday to support his case.

"You know, I'm supportive of two tours here, PGA and European," he said. "That is a seriously, seriously hard thing to do. Paul Casey has done it this year and found it very, very difficult. You can see that by his statistics. He's dropped in the world rankings. I've managed to move up in the world rankings this year.

"If you look at my statistics over the last 12 months in relation to the other names that have been put in the potential wildcard pick choice, you know, I'm 70 points in the world rankings ahead of Paul Casey and Darren Clarke. To put that into context, I finished second at the Open and picked up 60 points. So if you want to look at the whole statistics and look at how I've played for the year, take away the second place at the Open, and I'm still ahead of the two names that have been talked about right now. I've played very well this season. It's unfortunate I'm just not quite in the Ryder Cup side. I'm next in on the world points list and I'm next but one in on the European Tour Order of Merit list. I've done pretty damn well over the whole 12 months to be as close as I am on both tables, to be honest, and I think if everybody sits down and breaks down all the statistics, have a look, there are 11 less tournaments than Darren Clarke in the 12-month calendar, and I'm quarter of a million euros in front."

A fine campaign speech. A bit one-eyed, maybe, but you'd expect that with so much at stake. Statistics, you see, can do anything you want them to do. For instance, Poulter has not won in Europe or America for two years. Clarke, on the other hand, has won twice in five months. Poulter has one top five or two top tens in 2008, Clarke has five top fives or seven top tens, Casey has four top tens in his last six tournaments. You can alter the picture any number of ways.

We can really get into the nitty gritty of Poulter's stats if he wishes. His stroke average on the European Tour this year (49 rounds and 504 holes) is 71.88. That's his worst stroke average in seven years. On the PGA Tour he's a combined 43-over par for his tournaments. He ranks T48th in stroke average, T170th in birdie average and 121st when you bring in driving accuracy, greens in regulation, putts per round and other categories. Now, none of that does him justice, no more than the quarter of a million euro gap between him and Clarke reflects the Ulsterman's current form. If Poulter wants to downplay his rivals for a pick, well, the same can just as easily be done to him.

Fact is that he's a fine player, a successful Ryder Cup man of the past and a recent runner-up in the Open. But he should be at Gleneagles this week, he should be trying to secure the top five spot that would have guaranteed him a place at Valhalla instead of getting all indignant and trotting out some garbage about his 15 events. He's good but he's not so good that Faldo's picks should be seen as a formality, not with Clarke's apparent return to form and with his astonishing performance at the K Club two years ago still fresh in the memory.

Personally, I'd go for Casey and Clarke as the picks. Casey because he was sensational at the K Club himself and he's clearly inching towards his very best form at the moment and Clarke because of his experience, his natural partnership with Lee Westwood, his propensity to produce birdies in vast numbers and the impact he would have on the Americans. If they see Poulter on the tee beside them, they're going to be respectful but not intimidated. They see Clarke and they know they're dealing with a different animal.

One that wasn't pompous enough to assume that a win last week was sufficient to put himself in Faldo's team, one that travelled to a venue he obviously hates and battled hard, one that didn't have to talk about his burning desire to play in the Ryder Cup because his mere presence at Gleneagles said it all. The fact that Faldo spent part of his week watching tennis in New York won't reassure Clarke that his game is being studied closely by the captain, but you hope it is. You hope that Faldo doesn't think it's right for a player to opt out in this week of weeks. If he does, and he picks Poulter, it's going to take some amount of explaining.